Benny

UPSCALE WITH PRENTICE PENNY EPISODE 3

Benny
UPSCALE WITH PRENTICE PENNY EPISODE 3

 

Time for a get together with the homies. I’m not bringing the henny , patron, and the solo cups this time. I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking …

"HE TOOK THE BAR! THE WHOLE FUCKIN BAR!!!" Like Bluto from Animal House. Don’t trip. The bar not going nowhere we just upscaling it on episode 3 baby. 

 

 

SHAKEN NOT STIRRED 

The first segment we learn how to make James Bond drinks. To be honest when I was drinking often I drank all my alcohol straight. The only drink I know how to make is a white russian and that’s because I learned from a movie I’ve watched over 1000 times “The Big Lebowski.” 

I didn’t know any of those bar/drink tools homie was explaining. Making a drink is truly a science. He had more tools than Antonio Banderas guitar case in “Desperado.” When I had a bar in my old house I just had shot glasses and bottles and that’s it. Had a drink book that had hundreds of drinks to make but I never read that shit. We just drank out the bottle like savages. 


We learned about bitters which is something I never heard of in my life. They add kick to the drink you’re making. They were making drinks with alcohol in bottles with no labels and ice cubes as big as my macbook adapter. Now if you see a bottle of alcohol with no label you know you bout to get fucked up. That whiskey been around since the “In The Wee Small Hours” album  by Frank Sinatra. It’ll put some hair on ya chest. 

During this segment I wanted them to play “Buy U A Drank” by T-Pain so badly. 

 


THE GOOD MEAT NOT THE SANDWICH MEAT 

So Prentice goes to learn about the fancy meats and how to make a good charcuterie plate and yes I googled the fuck out of the word charcuterie. I had no clue what it meant or what it was. Another reason why Prentice show is clutch. I’m adding Charcuterie to my vocabulary so women will think i’m more important and upscale than I really am and I’ll seal the deal. 

Prentice takes a tour of the meat freezer aka Rocky Balboa’s gym and we learn how long it takes for certain meats to be prepared. 

The presentation of these plates are key and they have exotic cheeses on them too. All I could think of when I seen that cheese was Arsenio Hall saying “Damn! This some good ass cheese!” on The Chappelle Show. 

 

REAL MEN HAVE VINYL 

Okay I’m actually a expert on this. My dad has an insane vinyl collection and mine is decent. I love music so much and I agree with the store owner. Put the phones and playlists away and break out the speakers and the vinyl. 

My uncles used to have these fish fry’s when I was a kid and they did what O.G’s do. Dominoes, spades, shoot dice, talk shit and actually let albums play all the way through. So I’m listening to Pac, Jodeci, Dr.Dre, Biggie, Wu-Tang albums and just happy that I’m hanging with my family and this segment brought back those memories. 

As for sealing the deal Prentice. “Can You Stand The Rain” is a great song. Classic but if you wanna seal the deal you play the underrated New Edition classic “Superlady” and sing Ralph’s & Ricky's parts on the second verse to her. You would’ve sealed the deal for sure. Your pal Benny would never lead you astray. 

I LOVED the idea of having a cocktail party and having each person bring a vinyl. I’m going to try that with my friends. That is such a dope idea. 

If anyone is reading this who don’t know what Vinyl to bring to their party I can give you a few choices. 

Band Of Gypsy’s - Jimi Hendrix (Only if you know some good ass weed will be at the party) 

The Return Of The Space Cowboy - Jamiroquai (Clutch Album for small get togethers) 

The Chronic - Dr.Dre (My all time favorite rap album, self explanatory) 

Control - Janet Jackson (You can find your future wife if you find a woman who appreciates and dances to this album)

Mama’s Gun - Erykah Badu (The drinks Prentice made are perfect with this album) 

Mothership Connection - Parliament (Such a funky album it’ll make everyone let loose and groove)

Sketches Of Spain - Miles Davis (Go ahead and pick this up for yourself along with your cocktail party vinyl. Thank me later.)

 

GIFTS TOO???!!!! 

We learn about giving guests parting gifts for the cocktail party. 

Prentice gotta invite me to his cocktail party. I never received a gift at a party in my life not even my own parties. If you do I’ll gladly take the hangover potion. 

I like the idea of parting gifts for parties. It’ll leave a lasting impression on your guests. The picture party idea was really creative too. I always wanted to have a house party with a photo booth with the hood backdrop like my O.G’s on my block used to take at the clubs in the 80’s. You know like Ace, Mitch, and Rico did in “Paid N Full.” 

Prentice is all set for his party. The Charcuterie plate is on fleek. The vinyls have arrived. The drinks are Mad Men worthy. The only question that remains for me is ……..

WHO WAS THAT FOINE (FINE) ASS WOMAN WITH THE BLACK JACKET AND RED DRESS?! SWEET 5 OUNCE 6 OUNCE BLACK BABY JESUS!!!!! I’M IN LOVE!!! 

Time for all of us to throw cocktail parties and prosper!